Day 15 with a side of Tornado Warning

Today, Thomas showed some signs that maybe the quarantine is starting to get to him. He was crazy hyper and really short tempered today. He kept hollering at everyone about everything and I finally looked over at Evan and said, "I think he needs walked."

So, in between rain storms, we all got dressed and headed out as a family for a stroll. The boy wore their puffy vests and they were ADORABLE!

We spent a good 15 minutes before the walk saving as many worms as we could from certain death on the driveways and sidewalks. Elisabeth was very proud to see her siblings saving the lives of earthworms because she was often tardy to second grade (when we lived in Colorado) because she would stop to save every worm she could on her walks to school.

Julia, Vivian, and David rode their bikes, while Evan, Elisabeth, Thomas and I walked. 

Thomas is not a paparazzi fan.

While on our walk, we saw a friend and her oldest daughter. Her daughter is practicing her driving because she has her permit and my friend's in-laws live in our neighborhood, so they wanted to drive in another neighborhood besides their own that was familiar. You guys, it was so nice to see her! It took everything I had not to run over and hug her on the spot. I was so giddy to see a friend! Ugh. 

My sister-in-law had been making masks like a sewing professional to send to medical workers the last few days and I asked her to make a few for a good friend of mine. She mailed them to me and ones she'd made for the kids. They were thrilled! The younger ones immediately decided to play veternarians.

After our walk, we decided to do some arts and crafts that my father-in-law sent for the kids. They called them Papa Quarantine Gifts! The younger three got wooden vehicles to paint and put together.

(This is a tree picture from our walk. I thought the moss looked so pretty!)

Thomas was ALL BUSINESS about doing this project. He yammered to himself the whole time, declared the name of his race car (Speedy Fast) in his holler voice at least fourteen times, and was so dang proud of his work.

Having to wait for his paint to dry to add the stickers and then for the glue to dry on the axles before he could play with the car really pushed his three year old patience to the limit. We ended up talking Julia into giving him an impromptu bath so he could paint the walls to his content and try to wash away his bad attitude. It worked! He was totally human again post bath.

Evan is in charge of all things sourdough bread, and since we were having Pioneer Woman's Chicken and Noodles for dinner, he set about making a loaf of bread to have with the meal and two bread bowls for him and I to have.

 Aren't they pretty?!

 They were delicious!

 
Thomas was in rare form at dinner. Naked and trying to be a clown. You guys, the kid is crazy.

Giving him a manicure gave us a few minutes of stillness from him (like the February kid before him...).

After declaring the boys needed to be in bed earlier than normal (they'd woken up before 6:30am) and after reading a chapter of Harry Potter Book 5 to Vivian (who is still a horrible sleeper and takes forever to actually get to fall asleep), the damn tornado warning sirens went off and it took all I had not to say the f word in a string of creative profanity and refuse to comply because I had just gotten my kids to bed after fifteen straight days of quarantine and it just seems so unfair to throw in a post bedtime tornado into this situation, but I did none of those things. (Well, I did pout and act bratty about it all) We carried boys downstairs, woke up a very disoriented Vivian (who kept trying to get back to her room to bed), and stayed in the basement for half an hour until we got the all clear. Thank you to God, the boys stayed completely asleep.

We need a second couch in the basement. The older two girls had to sit in either kid sized or bean bag chairs. Plus, the couch we do have is a love seat, so we the five of us that were on it were all squished up together super cozy.

I'm thankful the tornado warning didn't get too serious.
I'm thankful the boys stayed asleep and Vivian fell right back asleep as soon as she got back to bed.
I'm thankful my friends in the area are ok.
I'm thankful for Old Fashioned drinks brought to me by my husband while I type this up.

I'm also glad I am documenting all of this for future us because I think my anxiety levels lately would make this all a big blur.

Today on the news, they announced the first case of an infant with Covid-19 died in Illinois. The first child to die from it on record. I've been really struggling with that news. It's so devastating and it ramped up fear about this whole thing all over again. For all of the complaints and annoyances about this time of shelter-in-place, I know that this is important. I know our compliance is not just for our own health and safety. Our decisions affect others. It's hard, but not as hard as us being sick. Not as hard as having to go into the hospital because the sickness was too much to be able to take care of at home anymore. Not as hard as being a medical professional and having to be in the front lines every day. Our feelings of frustration and annoyance about all of this are normal and expected, but, man, it could be worse.

One of my favorite writers and speakers, who I had the pleasure of getting to speak and meet at a conference in East Peoria, IL in 2015, wrote a poem about this whole pandemic experience that I reposted on Facebook. I'm going to share it here, too, because I really feel like this poem is so powerful right now.

Two Weeks of Quarantine

Yesterday kind of sucked and I took zero pictures and just tried to get through the day. Today, I felt better and actually got some things done that I've been avoiding. I also got in the car and drove to run an errand, so maybe that helped, too.

I guess Fridays are my day to venture to the store.

This time, the stores were almost deserted of people. I had a pretty small list: fresh produce, toilet paper, hand soap, milk, baby wipes, olive oil, butter, cheese, bread, and yeast. There were two packages of toilet paper left at Valli, which I was immensely thankful for!! There was no yeast, baby wipes or hand soap, but I was able to get everything else on the list! Which was exciting! And I didn't cry afterwards!

I stopped at Walgreens to see if maybe they had baby wipes and hand soap and they had both, but only a few left and you could only buy two hand soaps and two wipes (the travel kind). I am hoping to make a Walmart pick up order this week for the non perishable things, if I can snag a pick up time (in all honesty, I haven't checked in a while, due to anxiety). 

When I got home and dropped off all the groceries, I took any children who wanted a car ride with me to my favorite coffee shop, Meg's, for coffee. Meg's is where I go on Wednesdays when my babysitter usually comes. It's also where I go for book club once a month, and I desperately miss both things. I really, really want Meg's to still be up and thriving after all of this, so I've tried to go a couple of times since all of this started to keep supporting them. 

I also surprised the kids with a waffle maker. We'd been talking about getting one for a while (and by we, I mean me) and I thought, well, might as well be during a pandemic. They were truly so thrilled and are excited to make them on Sunday.

Today we made paper hearts to put up in the windows for people to see walking by and as a way of showing support for medical workers. Thomas decorated his hearts with Batman stickers and then screamed like a skinned cat when I tried to tape his up on the windows. He's a giver.

He's helping clean the table here. He would wipe a spot, lick the table, wipe the spot, re-lick the table, etc. (This is why he is not allowed out during the coronavirus time)

Julia's thoughts on scratch paper art:

Tonight, after saying prayers with Vivian, she quietly said to me, "Mommy, being quarantined is hard. I miss my friends." Break my heart.

Of course, it is supposed to thunderstorm tomorrow, but Sunday looks like it should be gorgeous weather, so I am going to declare tomorrow a baking/art/lego day (with some much needed chores thrown in for good measure), so we can all be outside as much as possible on Sunday.

I was thinking today, while I felt energized enough to tackle some things I had ignored or barely tried to do yesterday, that I am really thankful for my people. I'm thankful for Evan and my kids and this home we have where we can be trapped but loved (even when we're at our most unloveable). I'm thankful for our families (who are all in Pekin) who we talk to in some format daily, who are keeping us up to date on how they're doing. I'm thankful for my friends who let me vent, who also keep in contact daily, who have kiddos that are friends with my kiddos and are sending letters, video chatting, calling. I'm thankful for our neighbors, who make sure to wave or holler hello from a socially acceptable distance. This whole thing is so isolating and overwhelming, even in a house full of people. If you don't have space to process it alone or if you have too much space to process it alone and could use more people to share it with, this experience is a real eye opener in being vulnerable. What stresses me out might seem so insignificant to you, but your stresses might seem foreign to me because it wouldn't have occurred to me to be worried about them.

We are made to need people, which makes this shelter-in-place time hard. We're community based and we're being asked to keep away from our communities during this situation. I'm glad there is technology to keep up with everyone, but I CAN NOT WAIT to hug my friends again. I can not wait to plan a trip to the Madison zoo. I can not wait to let my kids roam the neighborhood with their friends again. I can not wait to visit my favorite coffee shop, to go on a proper date with Evan, to roam Target and its dollar aisle. But, most of all, I can't wait to hug our parents again. To hug my grandma. To hug our sisters and our brother in law. To squeeze our nephews and let our kids play with their cousins. To plan family lunches and dinners, roll our eyes at messes the kids have made, try to fit in all the activities my kids love to do in Pekin.

Day 12

Today was rough, y'all. Rough. 

I didn't want to get out of bed. 

I didn't want to feed anyone. 

I didn't want to talk to anyone .

Unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, kids don't really let you hang out in your room all day. They tend to wake you up to tell you that Thomas was leaking through his pajamas and needed changed because he kept sitting on the couch (I cleaned it, calm down). They need you to come down because you rationed the cereal to only one bowl before a grown up wakes up (Vivian feeds the boys breakfast in the morning because she is always the first one awake and is the biggest sister awake, so she gets breakfast duty...which is a parenting win, people) and they all want to have that second bowl. They want you to help them find their lost Lego Batman, to tell the sibling they are bickering with that you agree with them and not the other one, they want you to change your mind about video games before lunch, etc., etc.

So, I got out of bed.

I threw everyone outside again while I cleaned things and made lunch. I promised them an art day, so I had to finish my cleaning before I could fulfill my promise. 

I need to remember that I get as much out of doing art as they do.

I also need to remember that once we get the boys situated and done whining, they will get into a groove, create for about twenty minutes, and then wonder off to let us finish listening to the lady at McHarper Manor teach us the art lesson for the day.

Today, the younger girls deemed the art class needed to be a two part-er for different reasons (one because they had saturated their canvas with paint and legitimate needed it to dry before adding the silhouettes, and one because she needed some alone time to calm down), so I finished the painting solo. And it was kind of nice. My finished product:

During an ice storm in January, we lost one of our trees. Someone came to cut it and remove it from our now broken fence and neighbor's yard behind us, but the stump of the fallen tree was too frozen to saw through, so it's been sitting there waiting for spring. Our kids have taken a liking to it and are constantly playing with it. Julia took some pictures of the boys today playing some game on it.

We got mail today from Kyle Cain and in it she included this awesome sticker she had made and we stuck it onto our bathroom wall! The kids love it, especially David.

I don't know about you all, but it's been art that has been getting us through the days and I now have it displayed everywhere because I apparently need to ask my father-in-law to make us some shelves to put up to display all of our paintings.

Julia and I also made some clay art (the air dry kind!). She made a cat and I made a turtle. Thomas made a rock that is not pictured because he has deemed it a prize possession and has put it somewhere "safe".

Evan brought home some of his plants from work so they wouldn't die from neglect while he works at home. Good thing I have hung on to this shelf that my mother-in-law gave to us when we moved to DeKalb for law school 15 years ago this August! Seriously, it's one of my favorite things she gave us and she always would chuckle at how I hung on to it and insisted on putting it to use in every new house.

I made that list yesterday about getting some stuff done, and dagnabit, I meant it when I said I posted it to stay accountable. So, we took the leaf out of the dining room table and now it is at its smallest so we can easily get around and use it for extra work space if needed.

I also reorganized the kids' bookshelf and added the drawers for ALL OF THE ART-ING! It's a bit crowded (especially with the homeschool work buckets on top), but it needs to be more functional than appeasing to the eyeballs right now.

We had leftovers tonight for dinner, which was nice because I didn't feel like cooking. We didn't get a walk in before dinner, but, honestly, I really enjoyed painting alone, which is what I ended up doing before dinner. I think tomorrow I will make sure that when Evan comes down stairs, I'm ready to go for a walk.

I have no plans for tomorrow except to do school work with the kiddos and another art project. We all keep waking up way later than we usually do because there's no hustle to get out of the house on time. Are you all experiencing that, too? When life gets back to the normal non-quarantine routine, we are in for a rude awakening! (Also, by "all", I just mean Julia on up. Vivian and the boys still wake with the sun, she just quietly gets them cereal and they watch tv together and only wake us if someone needs a pant change, which I am not complaining about!).

P.S.
Dude, I started watching Little Fires Everywhere tonight on Hulu. Have you all read it? Have you all watched it?! Evan does not give a crap, but oh my word, so far I am loving how it is sticking with the book!!! And if you know me, you know my undying love for Reese Witherspoon, so you know I adore anything she tells me to read or watch!!!

Mr. Sun, Sun, Mr. Golden Sun, Please Shine Down On Me!!!

WE GOT TO GO OUTSIDE TODAY!!!!!

(This photo is out of order and from this evening when the kids got to video chat with their Papa and cousin, Owen, in Pekin!)

Here's our outside pictures!!!:

Some of us feel like it isn't as warm as the other kids think it is:

We played outside all morning, so school work was done in piecemeal as kids came in to take breaks. Thomas found this cat costume and there was no need for him to wear a jacket the rest of the day.

We ended up deciding to have a big lunch and made pancakes, eggs, and bacon. The boys were very confused about what meal it was because lunch tends to be choosing what you want with fruit and a veggie tray.


Amazon delivered this precious cargo today:

 I was so flippin' excited!!! This is always a monthly delivery for us, and has been for almost a year, but I was worried they'd either be out or delayed. They didn't send the monthly soap we usually get, and it looks like it's been delayed, so we'll see when more hand soap reaches us...

The kids practiced safe social distancing today and talked to their friends from a distance. They said tonight at dinner that it was nice to see their friends, but that it was hard to not actually be near them. 

Evan and I went on a date walk tonight before dinner. You guys, it was so nice to get out of the house, to be outside, and to not have the kids interrupt me. I feel like a date walk every night might be a great idea!

Sometimes I think I'm not going to blog at night. I'm not really saying anything new (NOTHING NEW HAPPENS IN QUARANTINE!), but I know that writing down our days, even though they look and feel the same, is important for me. Writing this all down is a way for me to process all of this. I'm not very good at always allowing myself to feel the hard emotions. I tend to ignore or make light of things and I just feel like this isn't a good time to be putting my head in the sand. Not that I should make myself crazy by trying to read everything either, but there's got to be a happy middle.

Today at dinner the kids were asking when this would be over and it really sucks to not have answers for them.  They're all being great about this, but teaching and learning to sacrifice in such a big way is hard for them and for us. It's a big picture kind of sacrificing. It's the kind of sacrificing that really makes you dig down deep to explain why you are choosing not to live selfishly at this time in our history.

David calls the pandemic "the sickness". He reminds us to wash our hands after getting the mail or packages so that we can wash off "the sickness". When Evan was still going into the office last week, David would ask if he got "the sickness" at work. Even at four years old, he is listening and absorbing what we're saying and doing and processing it the best he can for his age. When they all look back at this time, I want them to know why we made the choices we did and why we chose to be strict with the recommendations about quarantining and social distancing.

I know so many of you are also sacrificing and that it is so damn hard right now. I know my ramblings are by no means earth shattering, but hopefully you feel less alone in the boring mundane of being stuck in the house; less alone in feeling like hearing one more bit of news might make your body implode with anxiety and fear; less alone in feeling like there are parts of being home all the time that are kind of excellent and other parts that are kind of hellish; less alone in general.

Here's to another day in quarantine, friends! May your toilet paper be stocked, your electronics fully charged, and you minds at least somewhat peaceful for part of the day!

Day 10.

Today was another day of...the same. 

We are back on our homeschool schedule and the girls were hard to get going. They acted like they had never math-ed before or written real words or whatnot.

It warmed up a bit today, but there was snow on the ground all morning and just another day of bleh weather.

Today a friend texted me to tell me there EGGS and RICE at a store in Rockford! Then she left them on our doorstep for us and it was the nicest thing in the whole entire world. Who would have ever thought someone finding eggs and rice would be such a Godsend?! My kids genuinely cheered.

I can't really tell you what else went on today. I know I said yes to a movie, I know kids played and talked to friends either on the phone or video chatting. I know I did laundry and made meals and tried to read for a while.

It was just a day where I felt unmotivated. It all felt really heavy and I didn't want to deep clean or rearrange things or tackle my to-do list or create anything. The outside world feels really far away and heavy.

I've decided to quit looking for news. I have one news source that I have found to be non partisan and factual and if she doesn't post, then I will assume that I don't really need to know. It's how I am keeping myself from going crazy looking at the news and panicking.

I think I need to make a list of things that I would like to get done during this time. I know that every day is not going to be productive. I think it is unwise to pretend like this isn't scary or stressful, especially because we do have to take this all one day at a time. However, despite my Sanguine/Phlegmatic temperament combo, which tends to me more big ideas with no game plan or go-with-the-flow, I need some more structure for days when I feel "end of the world-y" heaviness or like we all could use a game plan.

We are on day 10, with no real definite end date in sight, and I don't want to make unrealistic goals that end up making everyone in my house feeling more stressed, but I know that, for me, having a few big goals that I can slowly hack away at are good for me.

So, I am putting them down here for accountability:

1. Create a new chore chart. The one we had before was mainly for the summer and hasn't transitioned into the school year well at all. Plus, recently Thomas discovered his name wasn't on it and he cried tears of sadness for being left out.

2. Tackle our basement. The basement is an area for the kids, but it has never been organized in a way that fits all of our needs and that doesn't lead to it just getting trashed. I would like to really gut it and start over.

3. Finishing the younger girls room. We've been tweaking the JV Squad's room since forever. Their needs seem to keep changing as they age, and we just haven't ever completely finished organizing their room in a way that works for them.

4. Put up our picture wall upstairs. Man, this is a project I have been wanting to do since we moved in and just keep not getting around to doing.

5. Moving things around to accommodate us all being home all the time. Reorganize the kid bookshelf. Move some drawers to the living room to hold all the newly gathered art supplies. Get the leaf out of the dining room table so we can move around in there better as people are looking for places to do work and projects. (Uh, this should be my number one...)

6. Read every day.

 I pray tomorrow we can get outside. We could all use a break from being cooped up.