Grump

I always hate when I'm grumpy at the girls. It makes me feel guilty. Because, overall, they are really, really good girls. But, because I'm their mother and because I'm with them all the ding-dong time, they overwhelm me.

Quickly.

And, today, I am defeated.

I know part of it is that I was very sick for two days, so I'm physically drained. And, I know that another part is that we've had a very long winter break where I didn't get my alone time(aka: bookclub) either because of illness or weather. I haven't recharged in over a month.

But, seriously, how many times can Julia say "Mom" in a minute? She was saying it so often today while I was grocery shopping that I couldn't concentrate on what I was buying or what was left on my list. A lady in the same aisle as us chuckled at Julia and her repeated "Mom"s, and I almost reached over and slapped the woman for laughing since I was so close to crying and leaving my baby and the cart in the store just so I could sit in my car in absolute silence.

And, why is Elisabeth either the most intense storyteller that has ever walked the planet (stories full of so much detail and repeating that I interrupt to finish sentences for her, only to have her lose her train of thought and start ALL OVER) or a comatose tv watcher that I can't even get to finish a sentence because she can't turn away from the television. It is rare that there is a happy medium with her.

And, why does my cat eat plastic? Is that normal? Why does he walk in front of my feet so that I keep falling over him and cursing?


When the girls do get under my skin, though, I can't help imagining when they leave for college. What I'll do with my time. The places Evan and I will go. How late I'll sleep in. Oh, I know that just because they leave for college doesn't mean they won't be out forever. Please remember, I've moved back home myself as a grown-up. But, I can't help it. I could read all day long. I could shower whenever I want. Cook whatever foods I think are fantastic. Watch any thing I want on television. Run errands for as long as I need to. The possibilities are endless, I tell you! Endless!!!

Don't worry. I'm not trying to wish them away any time sooner. Well, today I am. But, normally, I don't try to wish them away any time sooner. I know that they won't be this small forever. I know that all the things that are bothering me now will turn into pre-teen and then teenager things that will be even worse and I'll long for these nuisances.

However, for today, I am going to wish them away to college. It's what's keeping me going today. That and Diet Coke.